"...the one that makes me scream," she said...

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2006-11-05T03:13:09Z

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makes_me_scream @ 2006-10-31T01:15:00

2006-10-31T06:15:50Z

*headdesk*

makes_me_scream @ 2006-10-26T14:35:00

2006-10-26T18:47:50Z

At the library. Using their wireless internet. And it didn't require a computer check like in a lot of places! Which is nice because I didn't feel like spending time with the librarian while she got it all set up. Takes too long. I just had to have a password with my library card, and I did, so yay! Of course, it took three tries for the internet to kick in, but, whatever. It's worth it.

I think I'm going to check out Cowboy Bebop while I'm here. I noticed they had the first three volumes, and I feel compelled to check them out.

Mostly, I'm attempting to avoid my cousin. Apparently she's in town, and I do not want to put songs on her iPod. If she can't figure out how to do that on her own (and if her cousin can't even while having an iPod), than, I'm sorry, but you shouldn't have one. Also? You're a bitch. I don't want to see you. Maybe if you hadn't been so rude, I'd be more willing to help. Supposedly she'll be in today and today only. One can only hope she won't stay over the weekend, though, with my luck, she will. However, I mean to have plans. Anyone want to do something? Currently, I'm free!

Wrists are for girls. I'm slitting my throat.

2006-10-14T03:47:01Z

I'm not sure it's really worth it anymore. I do everything I can, and it still turns out like shit.

My life has to be some big, cosmic joke. Someone up there is laughing at me. Hysterically.

I clearly can't be whatever you all want so fuck you all. I'll see you in hell.

makes_me_scream @ 2006-10-11T00:08:00

2006-10-11T04:10:07Z

Rider Strong was on Veronica Mars! Swoon.

makes_me_scream @ 2006-10-02T07:26:00

2006-10-02T11:32:16Z

I am officially sick of waking up too early (by my standards). Granted, I'm not fond of sleeping in too late, but waking up before the sun just makes me cranky.

On random bright sides, my dad goes back to work soonish, and my birthday's coming up! I'm doubting seriously that there's a way I could convince the parentals that a new computer would be good, and that I'd take it as a birthday and Christmas and whatever other holiday gift. I think I'll just ask for money and put it in the bank. Should be easier anyway.

I gotta remember to call the doctor today. I was supposed to make an appointment for... soon, but I forgot, and their computers were down last time I talked to them. Hopefully they've got some sort of opening next week regardless of the time. *crosses fingers*

And sleep shall be attempted yet again. Whee!

makes_me_scream @ 2006-08-20T18:48:00

2006-08-20T23:28:32Z

... wow. So, apparently, you couldn't call me to let me know you'd gotten a new phone and there was trouble with it, that you moved back to Seminole, you're getting a divorce, AND you've got a new boyfriend? Wow. Some best friend you are. Whatever. Have a nice life! :D

Anyway!

I need a bookcase. And I realize the easiest way to get one is to rearrange my room and steal my mom's (not so much stealing since she said I could have it, but, sh), but I've no motivation to rearrange my room. Again. I think, perhaps, I may be getting distracted too easily as I've started multiple times in the past few weeks to make my room more bookcase compatible. I might need to bribe myself instead. That could work.

Maybe.

Hrm.

Summer's inching to an end. We go to Germany in September. I haven't gotten the paper work for the test. And I hate standardized type tests. They make me sick. Perhaps I should have gone into a different profession. Like... book store clerk. I can do that! I can so be a book store clerk. I think.

If past lives are real, I must have done something kinda crappy to end up where I am right now. I don't think karma's real, though, unless, again, it's all left over from some past life. *flails*

I think, tomorrow, after I go beat them down for not giving me my sodding diploma like they were suppose to (bastards), I'm going to head off to the library. Hopefully before the high school and/or middle school crowd gets there. Nothing against them. I just don't feel like listening to debates on who would win in a fight: Naruto or Gaara. (And I actually do have an opinion on that, but it's not got facts to back it or the opposing opinion up, so it gets to be quiet.)

... You know, I wonder what politics would be like if the issues had to do with things like like that. "Mr Candidate, what's your favorite show and why?" "Mr Candidate, Superman or Batman and why?" "Mr Candidate, what are you views on The Golden Trio of Hogwarts and the tensions between Ron and Hermione? Do you think they'll get together in book seven?"

Maybe I need to get out more...

makes_me_scream @ 2006-07-26T11:37:00

2006-07-26T15:41:21Z

The Zombie Survival Guide

The end.

High School Stereotype Quiz for the Bored

2006-07-04T06:02:01Z

-=-Jock-=-
[ ] You've played a school sport.
[ ] You've been on a school varsity team.
[ ] You've been on JV
[ ] You've been doing sport for years.
[ ] You know your closest friends from sports.
[ ] You are physically fit.
[ ] People would not call you "lazy."
[ ] You eat healthy.
[ ] You own at least one nalgene water bottle.
[ ] You want/have already recieved a scholarship for playing that sport.
[ ] You like to work out.
[x] You are a member of a fitness club. (I was, but I was taken off because I didn't go enough for the membership to be worth it. Of course, I was SICK at the time and would love my membership back, damn it.)
[ ] You take winning in P.E. class more seriously than others.
[x] You don't mind getting down and dirty.
[ ] You don't have modesty in the locker room.
[ ] You tend to whip others with wet towels.
[x] Your shoe collection consists of mostly sneakers. (I don't do high heels other than for church and special occasions. Same goes for most other types of shoes.)
[ ] You've won an award for a sport's achievement.
[ ] 4 shots of tequila doesn't even phase you.

Total = 3

-=-Outcast-=-
[x] You dont have very many friends.
[x] Often times, teachers forget your name.
[x] you were always picked last for kickball.
[ ] You dont like to talk a lot.
[x] You tend to avoid mass social activities (i.e.- dances, ice cream socials, football games, etc.)
[x] You dont participate in any extracurricular activities. (I tried once, but it didn't work out.)
[x] All you wish for is to move away or get a fresh start.
[x] Your friends have blown you off before.
[x] You sit alone in most of your classes.
[x] You have a feeling that once you leave high school or college, nobody is going to remember you.
[x] You hold interest in activities that other people find strange.
[x] People dont find you friendly. (I never understood that because I'm generally a friendly enough person. Maybe I've gotten bitter in my old age?)
[ ] You hold extreme hate towards another high school stereotype (i.e- jocks, preps, etc.)
[ ] You eat alone at lunch.

Total = 11

-=-Party Girl/Boy-=-
[ ] Lets face it: you like to party.
[ ] You party every other weekend.
[ ] You've been going to frat house parties since early high school.
[ ] You know the best hook-ups in the state.
[ ] Everybody whos anybody goes to the same parties you go to.
[ ] You spend time getting ready for parties.
[ ] Youve passed out from being too drunk.
[ ] Youve partied all night.
[ ] Youve snuck out of the house to party.
[ ] Actually, your parents really dont give a shit if you party or not.
[x] Youre pretty much nocturnal. (Yeah, because I'm such a partier. Me and The Twilight Zone have had some crazy nights. *eyeroll*)
[ ] You like to go clubbing.
[ ] You and your friends always party hop.
[ ] Youve crashed a party before.
[ ] One way or another, youve wound up naked in front of everybody at a party
[ ] Youve thrown up from drinking way too much.
[ ] Youve done something that you regret at a party.
[x] You can dance. (Because I took lessons?)
[ ] Youve had a hangover.
[x] You're friends with a lot of people older than you.

Total = 3

-=-Scene Kid-=-
[x] You know what sXe and hXc actually mean
[ ] You have a obsession with dinosaurs, robots, and Pokemon.
[ ] You idolize Jeffrey Starr.
[ ] People have called you scene before.
[ ] You spend at least an hour getting ready to take pictures of yourself for your myspace.
[ ] You have a mirror pic
[x] You listen to bands that most people have never heard of. (At the least, I listen to bands most people I know don't listen to.)
[ ] You enjoy going to shows.
[ ] You only go to shows for the sake of going to shows, not the music.
[ ] Your hair is multicolored.
[ ] You accessorize your hair with kiddie barrettes and bows.
[ ] Fashion is one of the most important things that define you.
[ ] You mosh.
[ ] You often mix vintage with modern.
[ ] Your myspace picture captions are sad lyrics to sad songs.
[ ] All of your friends are scene.
[ ] You dont know many of the people on your friends list in person: you just added them because they were scene.
[ ] You take angled pictures of yourself.
[x] You enjoy photography.

Total = 3

-=-Prep-=-
[ ] You pop the collar (What?)
[ ] You wont go near the Goths (They're very scary. That whole conquering part of the Roman empire? Very scary. *cough*)
[x] You own at least one thing from a designer store. (Shut up. Shut up. Shut up.)
[x] You are very clean cut. (I like to be clean?!)
[x] You are squeamish. (Yes, but not about blood and guts and such.)
[ ] People have called you preppy before.
[x] You never leave the house without putting on cologne/perfume (I like smelling nice.)
[ ] You have a lot of money.
[x] You know who LC is. (I blame my cousins for that one.)
[ ] You watch shows like The OC, The Real World, The Hills, and Laguna Beach.
[ ] One favorite stores are Abercrombie & Fitch or American Eagle Outfitters.
[ ] Youre afraid to set foot into Hot Topic.
[x] You carry a purse wherever you go.
[ ] You will not take alcohol straight up.
[x] you need to wake up at least an hour before school so you can get ready. (I need at least an hour to get my ass out of bed. I don't do mornings.)
[ ] (Girls) You do not leave the house without make up.
[ ] You are content overall with how your life is going.
[ ] You constantly text.

Total = 7

-=-Band Geek-=-
[x] You have played an instrument before. (Three cheers for the recorder! And attemtping the guitar.)
[ ] You still play an instrument.
[ ] You are/were in Jazz Band.
[ ] You are/were in Marching Band
[ ] Youve never dated anybody outside of Band.
[ ] Most of your friends are in band.
[ ] The band room/band hall is your second home.
[x] You enjoy listening to classical music on occasion.
[ ] You aspire[d] to be a Drum Major.
[ ] Youve made out with somebody on a band bus or at a band competition.
[ ] You have trouble getting your non-band friends to go near the band room.
[ ] Band is your favorite class.
[ ] You have been to band camp.
[ ] You walk in step with all your friends.
[ ] You talk about band constantly.
[ ] You know that American Pie has got it all wrong.
[x] You abhor rap music.
[ ] Marching Season is your favorite time of year.
[x] When you go to football games, you dont really pay attention to the game itself.
[ ] Your favorite jokes are band jokes.
[ ] You know it's not about the bloods and the crips: it's the brass and the woodwinds.

Total = 4

-=-Thespian-=-
[x] you have seen a school play.
[x] You have seen a Broadway musical
[x] You like to act.
[x] You have participated in a school play.
[x] You have participated in a play outside of school.
[ ] You have gone to the Thespian Conference (State or International or both)
[x] You get pissed off when people make that thespian, did you say lesbian? joke.
[x] You have done tech.
[ ] You know that you cannot touch anybody elses props.
[ ] You have played in the pit orchestra for a musical.
[ ] You have been to a cast party.
[ ] You are/were in a thespian troupe.
[ ] You often sing show tunes at the top of your lungs.
[ ] You know who Idina Menzel and Johnathan Larson are.
[ ] At one point in your life, you were obsessed with RENT.
[ ] You do not have a personal bubble.
[x] You actually understand Shakespeare.
[ ] You know how to put on stage make up.
[ ] You have been a lead.
[ ] You met a lot of your better friends through theatre.

Total = 8

-=-Overachiever-=-
[ ] You participate in a lot of extracurricular activities.
[ ] You have a part-time job.
[x] You have gotten straight As. (Once...)
[ ] You are in mostly honors/IB/AP classes.
[ ] You do not procrastinate.
[ ] You have scored a 5 on an AP test.
[ ] You do not have very much down time.
[ ] You are very organized.
[ ] You always have a thousand things going on at once.
[ ] You are/were in a long-term relationship.
[ ] You aspire to get into an Ivy League School.
[ ] In your extracurriculars, you hold leadership positions.
[ ] You are on Student Council.
[ ] You are/were the class president.
[ ] You are/were a class officer.
[ ] You are/were the Salutatorian for your class.
[ ] You are/were the Valedictorian for your class.
[x] People have told you that you didnt have a life.
[ ] You are getting/have already received the IB Diploma.
[x] You cry hysterically get upset when you get anything lower than an A on anything. (Ok. Generally it's a B, but, sometimes, it is that A when I thought I deserved the A.)

Total = 3

-=-Slacker-=-
[x] Your grades are slipping. (They were, but I got them up at some point, so all was good in the grade department.)
[x] You always wait until the last minute to do big projects.
[ ] You do a lot of things half-assed.
[x] You are an overall procrastinator.
[x] You tend to do your homework when youre watching TV.
[ ] It takes you ages to turn your job applications in.
[ ] You are often late to school/work.
[ ] You dont turn in a lot of your work.
[x] You spend the majority of your time watching TV, the computer or going on Myspace when you could be doing something more productive. (Not Myspace, though. That's just evil.)
[ ] You sleep in past noon on the weekends and during the summer.
[ ] You do not get out of your pajamas unless you have to leave the house.
[ ] You could walk, but youll just drive.
[x] You have fallen asleep during class before.
[ ] Friends have called you lazy.
[ ] Life is hard when you lose the remote & you have to walk a million miles over to the TV and change the channel.
[ ] When you hang out with your friends, the majority of your time is spent playing video games or doing something where neither of you have to stand up.
[ ] You have eaten an entire pint of ice cream in one sitting.
[x] You have sat through an entire running marathon of a show before.

Total = 7

-=-Goth-=-
[ ] Your wardrobe consists of mostly black things.
[x] When you have the money, you shop at Hot Topic. (I like their hats and some of the other accessories there. And some of the other random things they have. Like hell I can fit into their clothes.)
[ ] You think tattoos are hot.
[x] You think odd piercings are hot. (But it depends on how "odd" odd is here.)
[x] You dont get along with your parents. (Sometimes I do, though.)
[x] You have wanted to dye or dyed your hair an exotic color.
[ ] You've styled your hair in liberty spikes.
[x] Sometimes you ponder the meaning of life and death.
[x] You like to write dark poetry.
[ ] You are into S&M.
[ ] You have a pair of oversized black pants.
[x] At one point in your life, you liked Foamy, Happy Bunny, Emily the Strange, and the Happy Tree Friends.
[ ] You listen to grunge.
[x] You have a messenger bag with buttons up and down the straps.
[ ] You smoke cigarettes.
[ ] You will only date other Goths.
[x] You dont really give a shit what people think about you.
[x] Overly happy people scare you. (If you lived with my mom, they would scare you, too.)
[ ] You like black makeup & nail polish best.

Total = 10

-=-Nerd-=-
[x] You actually study for tests and quizzes. (I tried, at least.)
[x] You have/ had straight As. (Does once count?)
[x] You havent had any luck with the opposite sex. (Not much luck, anyway.)
[x] You are into WOW, Magic Cards, and Halo. (Not exactly, but basically the same things.)
[ ] You overanalyze jokes to the point where they arent funny anymore.
[x] Your mom buys your clothes for you. (Technically, yeah. But it's more like, "Look! There was a sale! It was 99.999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999% off!" Then I try it on. It looks like shit, and she wasted that tiny percentage of money on something no one will wear. An argument ensues about my ungratefullness at my honesty and cooperation. She acts like a martyr, takes it back, and it starts all over again.)
[x] You actually answer the questions in class.
[ ] You sit front row center in all of your classes to get the best learning experience.
[ ] You miss school during the summer.
[ ] You wear your pants at your waist.
[ ] You prefer sweatpants to jeans.
[ ] You have a pocket protector in your shirt with pens and a calculator in it.
[ ] You let cute boys/girls take advantage of you & copy your homework in hopes of getting noticed.
[x] Youve noticed some of the spelling and grammar mistakes in this survey.
[x] People always cheat off you during tests. (They've tried to, anyway.)
[ ] Your parents pack your lunch for you every day.
[x] You wear/should be wearing glasses.

Total = 9

-=-Garage Band Junkie-=-
[ ] You play the lead/rhythm/bass guitar.
[ ] You have been in a garage band before.
[ ] Youre still in a garage band.
[ ] You think your band is going to make it big someday.
[ ] You play shows almost weekly.
[ ] You play the drum set.
[ ] You sing vocals for a band.
[x] You write your own lyrics.
[ ] You spend hundreds on amps and microphones.
[ ] Your band has a myspace page.
[ ] You have been in multiple garage bands.
[ ] You have changed the name of your band at least twice.
[ ] You have participated in a battle of the bands
[ ] Your band has been signed.
[x] You have taken guitar classes at school. (Not at my high school, but I did take lessons.)
[ ] You have played at the same venue multiple times.
[ ] You would rather make it big than have to go to college.
[ ] You have musical talent.
[ ] You have groupies.
[ ] Youve made t-shirts and other apparel for your band.

Total = 2

-=-Gangsta-=-
[ ] You actually are black.
[x] You know who the bloods and the crips are.
[ ] You wear doo-rags.
[ ] You actually grew up in the ghetto.
[ ] You can freestyle.
[ ] You drive down the street blaring your music.
[ ] Your ride is pimped out with stereo boosts.
[ ] You can break dance.
[ ] You say nigga a lot.
[ ] You talk too fast for people to understand you.
[ ] You are pretty chill with life.
[ ] You wear your jeans oversized and below your ass.
[ ] Old school rap is the best.
[ ] You know that Tupac will never die.
[ ] You wear bling
[ ] You have/want a custom grill.
[ ] You have custom rims on your tires.
[ ] You are actually in a gang.

Total = 1

-=-Emo-=-
[ ] You often have trouble convincing people that you arent emo.
[ ] You comb your hair over one of your eyes.
[ ] You flip your hair
[x] You have dark-rimmed glasses. (They're blue and STFU.)
[x] You have cut yourself before. (I know this most likely means deliberately, but, since it didn't specify...)
[ ] If youre a boy, people often complain about your pants being too tight. (I am all for the tight pants on certain guys.)
[ ] You dont really smile too often.
[x] You blog often. (Or, well, I used to.)
[ ] You never smile in pictures.
[ ] You listen to Thursday and/or Sunny Day Real Estate.
[ ] Youre too much of a pussy to be a goth.
[ ] You own band t-shirts.
[ ] You go to a lot of shows.
[ ] You only go for emo/scene boys and girls.
[ ] It doesnt take very much to make you cry.
[ ] You have played all the Emo Games (www.emogame.com)
[x] You have worn black eyeliner before. (I was either dressed up for something fancy, or I was letting someone play doll with my hair and face.)
[ ] You own a bandana which you wear in your hair.
[x] You have dark hair. (And it's natural so HA!)

Total= 5

-=-Skatepunk-=-
[x] You own a skateboard. (At some point, I did. It was my brother's originally. I can't find it, though.)
[ ] You have been skateboarding since you were in grade school.
[x] You have gotten many injuries from skateboarding.
[ ] You know that World Industries and Element arent just clothing lines.
[ ] You have vandalized public property.
[ ] You have TPed somebodys house before.
[x] You have been yelled at for loitering.
[ ] have gotten in trouble with the cops.
[x] You listen to punk rock. (I guess... I listen to just... whatever catches my interest.)
[ ] Chicks on skateboards are hot
[ ] You stick it to the man!!!!!
[x] You own skater shoes. (And I love them dearly.)
[ ] You watch MTV2, not MTV.
[x] You enjoy crude humor.
[ ] Fuck school, lets do crazy shit.
[ ] You have watched the X games.
[x] You know that there are other pro skaters out there besides Tony Hawk.
[ ] You pretty much live at the skate park.
[ ] Hygene does not concern you.
[x] Skater boys are attractive (So long as they know that hygene IS important, yes. Some are.)

Total = 8

The results are in...

1st Place--Outcast

2nd Place--Goth

3rd Place--Nerd

And I think I have at least one X in every catergory.

makes_me_scream @ 2006-07-03T00:33:00

2006-07-03T04:34:54Z

To Whom It May Concern,

Fuck you and rot in hell.

Hugs and kisses,

Molly

Dear Bryan Singer,

Why couldn't you have directed both X-Men: The Last Stand and Superman Returns? While I'm probably one of the few who didn't totally hate the third installment, I still don't see why you couldn't have been cool and done both.

Signed,

A Curious Fan

P.S.,

Kudos on Superman Returns.

On an unrelated note, The Twilight Zone has gone and sucked me in again. Whee!

makes_me_scream @ 2006-06-19T13:57:00

2006-06-19T18:12:33Z

Guess who's out of school? That's right! It's me! And I graduated with honors! And what did I get? "Oh. Congrats. *goes back to t.v.*" Yeah, well, fuck you, too.

But still! Graduated! Granted, still studying for certification test, but one step closer!

And it's bad, right, that all of a sudden, I'm not so sure about being a massage therapist?I feel all like maybe this isn't right for me after all. I'm all excited I got this far, but now I'm stopping and looking around, wondering about other fields. For example, for a long time I've wanted to be a writer. Not an easy thing, obviously, to get published, but it's still something I've wanted to do. And, apparently, it's also something you can go to school for. Except I have no idea if it's something I could do more than something I'd want to do.

I don't know. I'm doing that having doubts thing. I shouldn't. I should be confident, get my license, get a job, and then save up, because I suppose I could always go back. I mean, I have prepaid for SPC and stuff, except I don't think they'd let me back in... Meh. I don't know, but the cousin's here, so mayb I'll muse over all of this later.

makes_me_scream @ 2006-05-12T23:21:00

2006-05-13T03:34:20Z

ARGH!!!

That about sums it all up.

Out of no where, it all went SPALT!!! and downhill.

What.

The.

Fuck.

Whatever. I'm not going to obsess. I'm not going to worry. It's useless bullshit. It doesn't matter.

And, don't ask, but I'm still upset about Carnivàle being killed prematurely last year. I'm hoping some sort of television miracle will bring it back, though I'm still of the opinion that the general viewing public is full of mindless dipshits who can't bother to sit for an hour if it makes them think too much. Unless, of course, we are talking strictly CSI type shows. Or Veronica Mars. Then they can. Otherwise, nope. Not worth it. (I like Veronica Mars, though.)

Excuse me. I'm feeling a little bitter. My apologies.

But really. Carnivàle needs more viewers. The fact that they're showing the first two seasons again at all has to say something to someone about the show. Not all canceled shows get that, especially so soon after being canceled. The fan base as to be growing even just a little...

All right. Stopping. This entry is basically pointless anyway.

makes_me_scream @ 2006-04-12T21:10:00

2006-04-13T01:34:18Z

Spring Break!!!

I've done basically nothing different than I do every other day, really. Kind of dull. I'm dull. The big difference is no class and I am home for Prime Time TV.

Fuck. I wanna see Silent Hill when it comes out. I have a deep seated "this girl is an amazing little actrees" belief. It's hard to explain, but she's just.... wow. Like Dakota Fanning only a little younger and dark haired.

My throat's been feeling yucky for about a week. And the headaches are starting back in again. WTF? I hate this. And it's all "normal". Bullshit.

Yeah. Whatever. Fuck you, too, World. Fuck you, too.

makes_me_scream @ 2006-04-02T11:00:00

2006-04-02T15:14:19Z

I think the puppy is doing better. Or, at the very least, he's super stubborn and is trying to walk. We got him a chew thingy so he'd not be too bored with his lack of ability to walk around. And so he'd not get any sneaky ideas to chew on more of our things.

I'm hoping the parental types forgot to turn their clocks forward and don't remember until it's a bit too late for church. While I know it's not always a bad thing to go and blah blah blah, I get repulsed by a lot of things if they're forced upon me by outside influences, like my mom. I don't entirely know what I believe, and I don't like others' beliefs forced upon me. Mentioned and tossed out there and waiting to be explained if asked about is totally fine. But shoved down my throat makes me gag.

Last night, while leaving for dinner for my dad and brother's birthday dinners (Dad's was Thursday and brother's was Friday), my mom made a comment about a shirt being "too revealing" (I'm way too shy to reveal more than arms and legs, thank you, so it wasn't. Regardless of what anyone says) and how I "looked like a bum". I thought I looked nice, actually. Jeans, sure, but she said I didn't have to get super dressed up. So I put on a nice pair of jeans, a nice tanktop, and a jacket sweater thing in case I got cold or the short sleeves was a little inapropriate. I had on closed toed shoes, did my hair, and my make-up. Somehow, it's still wrong. I think she wants me to be her fucking life-sized Barbie. And then she told me I need to repent, which just made her look like Margaret White to me, only a little less extreme and distinctly more happy. It's just really, really frustrating.

I went to bed around midnight last night, and that was nice. I actually got sleep, too. It's always good, but I can't figure out how to get rid of these horrible headaches. I woke up with one today. I woke up with one last Sunday. I went to bed with one last Saturday. I've had them off and on all week. I know what is not causing them, so that's ruled out. I've been trying to stay hydrated. I'm not sure what else it could be other than extremely annoying and painful.

I don't think I can go to that Reiki class. If it's April 28th, which I believe it is, I can't. I have to go to South Carolina around that time to see Angel and be there for the official court house wedding. I'd be a horrible best friend if I blew her off for a Reiki class, especially as I made that commitment first. And, even if I hadn't, I'd still go South Carolina.

Oh joy! We missed church. I shouldn't be so happy about this, really, I shouldn't, but I can't help but be happy. The minister/preacher man that usually does the sermon... I don't like his sermons. He's an ok guy and all, but I don't like his sermons. I always daze out anyway, so it isn't even like I'm there when I do go and get dressed and show up. It's just a lot of extra work for nothing.

I think I'm going to go get some water.

makes_me_scream @ 2006-04-01T10:12:00

2006-04-01T16:09:08Z

The puppy is home from his surgery, and that means I get to play animal babysitter! Oh the joy. I love the dog. I really do. I just don't like sitting on the couch all day with him while everyone else is out doing something. Yes, parents, I'm painfully aware of the lack of life I have, but must it be furthered rubbed in my face by acts of making me wake up before the sun because you two won't be home and placing me in the family room. If I have to watch him, how am I to clean like you fuckheads want anyway? It doesn't make sense.

In other news, there's not a whole lot else to report. I might attend a Reiki class this Dr Jim guy's gonna hold this month. I don't know for sure if I am. It's not expensive (price of the book and a love offering), it's just... conflicting with other things. I'd like to go, though, if I can.

I'd also like to eat. The mom's been cooking (call the papers!) all morning for this feeding of the Ronald McDonald House (a worthy cause, yes), and it's making me hungry, even though I don't like what she's cooked.

Argh. Back to the watching of the dog.

makes_me_scream @ 2006-03-26T13:23:00

2006-03-26T18:23:48Z

I hate having those headaches that last into the next day. The ones you can feel creeping in way before they truly settle. The ones that laugh and mock whenever you move. I hate them, and I wish I didn't get them so often.

Apologize all you want. I'm glad you did and you realize you really have no excuse. I have no doubt that either Aunt Lucy or my mom told you I was upset, and you can try to make it up all you want. I've just come to terms with the fact that you are undependable. And, if you noticed, I didn't say, "I forgive you," through the whole conversation. If it were the first time, sure. Okay. Shit happens. I'm guilty of these things, too. But it wasn't, and it'll take a bit more for me to easily forgive right now. I don't think you noticed, however, and that's fine. Generally speaking, you are oblivious to most things anyway. If it happens again, however, there's a good chance you'll find yourself musicless next time you come over to upload songs onto your iPod.

Two weeks, and then Spring Break. I'm excited, I think. And then, two months, and I graduate and take The Exam and yay! If I pass, anyway. If not--Well, let's not think about that right now.

makes_me_scream @ 2006-03-23T13:09:00

2006-03-23T18:18:27Z

Thank God for Thursday. Last day of school for the week, which is needed. Because... I've been lazy and not properly worked on the pool past pouring pool chemicals into it and running the pump. And tomorrow is a good day to work on it and get the leaves out and not get lectured about laziness and excuse me, but you're not the only one doing mentally and/or physically exhausting work. I would just like to see YOU go give two hours of fucking Shiatsu and other random massages. Shiatsu is a bitch to perform. And then when you get people going, "You can do more pressure," it tends to take toll on your hands and legs and fuck you, too.

But yes. Thursday. And it's the other classes clinic. Yay! I get a massage! Which is definitely needed. And on Tuesday I had my first client in clinic, and it went well. And there's this... thing where a certain amount of people get FREE student massage if they call and say I sent them and my teacher is Bruce Masse. And if you're reading this and interested, comment and I'll try to get info. Otherwise, oh well.

So my goal when I go to South Carolina for the in court making it official marrying of the friend and this guy is to find random single Navy guy (as he's in the Navy and is bound to have friends). Because, apparently, Florida's resources have been sucked dry. No more, I say! No more!

I need a new book. And I need to uninstall that one Sims game and install that other one. Because the other one is on loan right now, and, well, I can't keep it forever. And I feel like playing God on the computer. But first, a book! I'm just not sure what book. A part of me wants to find my missing Animorphs books and start up with them again. I just wish I could figure out where they might be.

I also need to get music/soundtracks. It's all about finding them now, though. And getting both my brother and my dad birthday gifts. I more or less know what I'm getting the dad. Just not sure on the brother. Might be cheap and just get him a gift certificate since I really have no idea what he likes.

Mm. Need food.

makes_me_scream @ 2006-03-19T22:06:00

2006-03-20T03:07:45Z

Blew me off. Again. The bitches. But, whatever. Expected it and basically over it.

Fuck them, too.

makes_me_scream @ 2006-03-17T10:58:00

2006-03-17T16:01:58Z

So, telling someone you'll do it first thing in the morning, you have it all taken care of, and all that jazz only to tell them basically that they're on their own is really annoying and frustrating. I'm sorry, but, if it had been me who had said that, you'd have expected me to carry through on my words, not pawn it off at the last second. So why is it you can't be true to your word? It's annoying and further proves the things I've said, even if you don't notice.

makes_me_scream @ 2006-03-16T12:15:00

2006-03-16T17:31:02Z

So far, so good on the sleep front. I've been in bed by two in the A to the M. I think only one night I fell asleep after two, but that's okay. For the most part, it's been before two.

I don't feel well. My head hurts and I keep coughing. And my stomach is uncomfortable.

I don't want to go to class, and I don't want to drive becuase the stupid battery light and the check engine light keep coming on, even though it's been checked. And checked. And tweaked. But no. It's still there. Glaring. Mocking. Laughing. And I just want a break.

Everyone's getting married. And I'm going to end up as one of those women who goes around saying, "Always a bridesmaid, never a bride," whenever someone talks about weddings. I can see it, and, I don't know why, but it scares me. Among many things.

I'm having a moment. I think I need lunch.

makes_me_scream @ 2006-03-12T22:21:00

2006-03-13T03:50:49Z

I'd planned on having a relatively relaxing weekend, but that didn't work out so well, apparently. Meh. Oh well. I got to see and play with the baby, so that's good. And some of the wedding things are taken care of, so that's less for us all to worry about, which makes me happy, and I'm sure makes my mom and cousin happy, too.

Sheena came over. To play with the iPod. Yay for being used by supposed loved ones. But, on the bright side (I think?), she did invite me to go with her and the other cousins next Saturday to the Renaissance Festival. I'm telling myself to be happy that I was actually INVITED this time, but I can't help but think how I'm always invited LAST when I am invited.

I think it's a rule that Ever After has to be playing on some channel every single weekend. I swear it's one of the most over-played movies out there. I'm really sick of it. If it wasn't for Melanie Lynskey, I'd seriously hate that movie by now.

Speaking of Melanie Lynskey, I really want to see Heavenly Creatures. But it isn't exactly new, so I may have to do some digging to find a copy of it.

I think I'm going to try and get to sleep before two in the a.m. It's a reasonable enough goal which will eventually be shortened in an attempt to give myself a better sleep schedule and prepare myself for the inevitable of a job that may require me to wake up earlier than I'd really like. But it's a good thing to have, a set sleeping schedule, and it's something I need. Not to mention, I'm sure it'd be beneficial in other areas, too, like health. And not feeling so sluggish all the time. I see only benefits from this.

I really want a root beer float. We need ice cream.

makes_me_scream @ 2006-03-07T17:10:00

2006-03-07T22:08:55Z

At some point, I think I sort of lost my mind, as I'm allowing myself to partake in the art of "fanfiction" via fanfic100. I'm going to blame role-playing, the current crappy games out there, and a need to write on all of this. Whee!

♥ Harry Potter
♥ Sally-Anne Perks
♥ 000/100

001.	Beginnings.	002.	Middles.	003.	Ends.	004.	Insides.	005.	Outsides.
006.	Hours.	007.	Days.	008.	Weeks.	009.	Months.	010.	Years.
011.	Red.	012.	Orange.	013.	Yellow.	014.	Green.	015.	Blue.
016.	Purple.	017.	Brown.	018.	Black.	019.	White.	020.	Colourless.
021.	Friends.	022.	Enemies.	023.	Lovers.	024.	Family.	025.	Strangers.
026.	Teammates.	027.	Parents.	028.	Children.	029.	Birth.	030.	Death.
031.	Sunrise.	032.	Sunset.	033.	Too Much.	034.	Not Enough.	035.	Sixth Sense.
036.	Smell.	037.	Sound.	038.	Touch.	039.	Taste.	040.	Sight.
041.	Shapes.	042.	Triangle.	043.	Square.	044.	Circle.	045.	Moon.
046.	Star.	047.	Heart.	048.	Diamond.	049.	Club.	050.	Spade.
051.	Water.	052.	Fire.	053.	Earth.	054.	Air.	055.	Spirit.
056.	Breakfast.	057.	Lunch.	058.	Dinner.	059.	Food.	060.	Drink.
061.	Winter.	062.	Spring.	063.	Summer.	064.	Fall.	065.	Passing.
066.	Rain.	067.	Snow.	068.	Lightening.	069.	Thunder.	070.	Storm.
071.	Broken.	072.	Fixed.	073.	Light.	074.	Dark.	075.	Shade.
076.	Who?	077.	What?	078.	Where?	079.	When?	080.	Why?
081.	How?	082.	If.	083.	And.	084.	He.	085.	She.
086.	Choices.	087.	Life.	088.	School.	089.	Work.	090.	Home.
091.	Birthday.	092.	Christmas.	093.	Thanksgiving.	094.	Independence.	095.	New Year.
096.	Writer‘s Choice.	097.	Writer‘s Choice.	098.	Writer‘s Choice.	099.	Writer‘s Choice.	100.	Writer‘s Choice.

makes_me_scream @ 2006-02-25T07:18:00

2006-02-25T13:05:24Z

Stomach hurts (or at least feels... uncomfortable), and it has since Thursday. I'm a little worried, but, at the same time, I think it might just be stress.

I'm kinda happy because I got some sleep last night, and it was all nice and before even one in the morning, but now I'm awake, and I'd like to get some more sleep. Being up at seven on a Saturday when I'm not going somewhere does not properly compute. Although I do have things I need to do, I don't need to do them right this moment. I really need to have a talk with the sleep centers of my brain.

Oh the joys of owning a pool, especially one with a creepy crawly thingy that doesn't work. I get to clean it by hand/with the most annoying vacuum type thing ever! But first, chemicals! Remeber, kids, muriatic acid burns like a bitch if it comes in contact with your skin! (And I just realized the pool hasn't had any diatomaceous earth...) And guess who will be home today and who will be recruited to help indefinitely? The mom!

I have such an exciting day to look forward to today.

Oh. Apparently after consultation, the mom's got to go check out the church for Vikki's wedding. Well, then, hm. But she did say she'd help and we'd work around it. I predict us getting the supplies, putting them in the pool, and then me tagging along to the church. I think I have some sort of obligation to as the Maid of Honor, though it'd mostly be because I don't want to be stuck at home, bored out of my mind. Or, at least pretty damn close to it. Plus, Isabella might be there, and I'd like to see my baby cousin. Not to mention, Vikki might be there, and I'd like to see her, too.

Ugh. My eye hurts. And I smell smoke. I bet that's why it hurts, all this damn smoke. When I get my own place, no one's allowed to smoke inside.

I think I'm going to try to get more sleep now. Meh.

You know you're bored when... you start doing blog memes!

2006-02-23T05:59:08Z

List ten things you want to say to ten people but know you never will.

1. I've noticed I'm the only one who makes the effort with this "friendship" of ours. Well, if you haven't noticed (and I'm sure you haven't as you're quite oblivious to things), I've stopped making that effort. I have passive-aggressively kicked you out of my life! HA!

2. I don't really have anything against you, but, sometimes, you tend to annoy me. Like when I'm talking and you interupt me, and then you don't let me finish what I'm saying. It irks me. A lot.

3. Remember those games we used to play? The weird ones where we'd turn red if we were overheard because they were so not the norm? I loved those games, and I miss when we used to play. They were such fun times. It's great we have them to stop and say, "Hey, remember that one time...?" It's weird, though... because I think I had an odd sort of attraction (crush is too middle school and silly a word) to you, and I probably still do. Not that I would tell you this, of course...

4. You have no idea how glad I am to no longer be friends with you.

5. I don't think I cried when I was little, but, sometimes, I cry at night thinking of you. I hope you're all right and happy. And, sometimes, I wish for signs to know you're okay and that it didn't hurt. Perhaps it's morbid, but I also wish I'd attend your funeral, though I don't even know if your mom gave my mom the information on it or anything.

6. Although it travelled through the grapevine a little, you have no idea how happy it made me when I was told you thought I was pretty. I just wish we were closer because, at the very least, I liked talking to you. And you can kind of understand better than anyone, but I could see it being a bit weird since I was your sister's best friend and all. Oh, and you have the prettiest eyes.

7. I love it when people think we're sisters. ^_^

8. I miss role-playing with you, even though I think we've grown too far apart for it to be the same. I loved our characters, and how they interacted, and I miss it. But, you know, it's okay with me that we've grown apart. I just hope you're honestly happy where you are in life right now. :-)

9. So this, ah, older guy you're seeing who I'm guessing you met on-line? Uhm... Yeah. I'm sure my opinions matter not in this situation, but I'm worried for and about you.

10. You! I love going to the movies with you. We should do it more often. Making random comments is a great de-stressor. Hell, even random commenting when not in the movies is great. There should be an increase in hanging out with each other time.

makes_me_scream @ 2006-02-22T03:33:00

2006-02-22T08:35:54Z

Sometimes, I can't help but wonder. "why?" Nothing in particular. Just, "why?"

It's weird. And it's usually when I can't sleep. I just wonder, "why?" and then stay up pondering it.

Sometimes I end up veering off the Why Course, and end up way out of the ball park and somewhere near the driving range. I leave a trail to get back, though. It's better than breadcrumbs. The little birds don't bother eating my trail.

I always end up on one road or another, and I tend to backtrack if I don't fall asleep partially down the street.

I miss Spike. A lot. The New Dog is a good dog, but... I miss my Spike. I have Muffin, though, and the Evil Demon Kitty who secretly loves me even if she refuses to admit it. The New Dog... Well, he came from a different environment, was a different age, everything. He's a Victorian Bulldog. He's bigger now at... eight or so months than Spike was at eight years old. He, too, loves to cuddle, but he also likes to chew everything if we're not in the same room with him. He was Spike's size when we got him, and he was only three months at the time. He's harder to train, but I think I'm making a little progress, slowly wearing him down, making him realize who the boss really is.

I feel bad because he has hip dysplasia. The options were put him to sleep or surgery. Obviously we've opted for surgery. Losing two dogs in less than a year (both of the bullies) would ruin our family's fragile psyche. He has to lose weight, so he doesn't have as much pressure on his hips. We're regulating the dogs' feeding times. Once in the morning, and once in the evening. No extra snackipoos, which will hopefully cut down on the begging. Water has nothing to make him fatter, so he's got this plush bone that absorbs water and then goes in the freezer. He likes to chew it.

He also has this weird thing for the pool, which is bad. Nasty pool water is not good for puppies. But, after the surgery, I think we're getting him a doggy life jacket so he can go in the poole and exercise the muscles without putting excess strain on them. I'll have to take pictures of that.

I need to start taking my camera with me more. And perhaps figure out how to obtain a digital one, though I love the one I have. I took it to Puerto Rico, England, and Paris with me, and I like how most of the pictures turned out. Some wanker walked in front of one shot, and the flash was on in a few others. I think I have the best picture of a gas station/place in Paris. And I got a few good pictures of "Paris 2012." I think I have a few good ones from the British Museum, and Tower Bridge (not to be confused with any of the London Bridges), too. Which reminds me, I should put those pictures back on my computer and fix them. Again.

My stomach hurts again. I think I'll just go to sleep.

Oh, and yay for new headphones.